The Wonderfully Weird Museums of Las Vegas

Las Vegas is not really known as a town for art lovers. Sure, Steve Wynn brought fine art to Las Vegas when he opened The Gallery at Bellagio before he sold the lavish resort to MGM, a move that drew as much derision as it drew praise (I couldn't find a link to the SNL sketch where Ben Stiller plays Wynn and announces the opening of the fine arts gallery by boasting "we got a butt load of Picassos!" but it's very funny. Trust me. But real life is funnier than sketch comedy anyway, as I can share a link to that amazing story where Wynn poked a hole in a real Picasso due to his poor eyesight.)

While a few of the galleries in Las Vegas resorts actually offer an opportunity to view some great works of art (despite the seemingly contradictory fact that they're in casinos on The Strip), you go to Paris for great art (and not the fake version of Paris in Las Vegas). When in Rome, do as the Romans do (and not the fake version of Rome in Las Vegas). The most interesting museums in the city are the ones that are just a bit weird and reflect the town's rich and extremely colorful history. And while I'm completely excited by a lot of the cool underground, independent art created by locals and exhibited in the many diverse and progressive galleries opening all over Downtown, that's not what I'm going to talk about in this post. What I'm going to talk about is the most colorful, unique, entertaining and just plain Las Vegas-y museums in and around the city (a list that sadly excludes the dearly departed and flamboyantly crazy Liberace Museum).

THE MOB MUSEUM and THE MOB ATTRACTION
Though its run by large international corporations today, Las Vegas was built by the mob. And while Occupy Wall Street-minded types might argue that large companies are worse than organized crime, the fact is that the mafia did a lot more tangibly awful things, like whacking people with Tommy Guns and saying things like "Keep the Change, you filthy animal" (because the fake movie that Kevin watches in Home Alone is based on reality, I'm pretty sure). That said, mob history is also a lot more interesting (in a lurid and dark way) than histories a corporations mergers and quarterly earnings reports. Which is why there are now two museums dedicated to the history of the mob in Las Vegas while there will probably never be a Museum of Multinational Corporations and Conglomerates (MMCC).

The Mob Museum, located in an old courthouse where many colorful criminals were actually prosecuted, does an admirable job of confronting Sin City's very seedy past, with an incredibly in depth history of the organized criminals who ran the town and how they were ultimately taken down. The museum tells both sides of the story, from the point of view of the mobsters and the point of view of the cops who doggedly pursued them, with tons of interactive elements, artifacts from the era, crime scene photos, and somewhat creepy pieces like real weapons used by mafioso foot soldiers and the actual barber chair in which Murder, Inc. boss Albert Anastasia was assassinated. The Tropicana also hosts their own Mob Exhibit on The Strip, with a more interactive element that fits in perfectly as a Casino attraction. Both of these exhibits are worth visiting, especially for fans of The Sopranos, Goodfellas, The Godfather, and Casino.
 
THE ATOMIC TESTING MUSEUM
Las Vegas is all about bright lights, and no light is brighter than the flash of an atom bomb. Sin City used to be the site of atomic bomb tests (okay, obviously not the city itself... if that was true, there would be a giant crater there instead of The Strip) which patrons of Atomic Liquors would watch as sipped strong cocktails. The Atomic Testing Museum, chartered by Congress and presented by The Smithsonian Institute, presents the history and controversy surrounding the creation of The A-Bomb through timelines, vintage films, photographs, and gadgets from the era. The museum takes you back in time with recreations of underground test facilities and dioramas of those eerie "nuclear families" made of All-American looking mannequins that were used in the tests, as well as interesting artifacts that bring the era to vivid life. This place is a must-see for any history buffs/ geeks looking to take a break from The Strip. (The Museum features a new Area 51 exhibit for an additional fee. I haven't seen it yet, and even though I love the idea of an exhibit covering the history of UFO sightings in America, the Yelp reviews have been less than kind.)



THE NEON BONEEYARD 
Even more than Los Angeles, Las Vegas is a town that sheds its identity quickly and without sentiment. Classic resorts where The Rat Pack partied and performed are mercilessly imploded to make way for the the latest slick multi-billion dollar resort that will become outdated within a few years as the city relentlessly pursues the latest and greatest trends (dramatic, right?). Luckily, the creators of The Neon Museum thought to preserve the colorful, garish, and sometimes seedy history of the great Las Vegas resorts of old in the form of their iconic neon signage. The nonprofit group that runs the museum has collected tons of the signs, which they describe as "Las Vegas' iconic art form," and gathered them in a 2 acre park. While some of the more famous signs are displayed on The Fremont Street Experience, if you want to see more of the 150 restored and donated signs that date from the 1930's- 90's, you'll have to make an appointment ahead of time. Also, be sure to check out the Neon Museum's visitor's center located in the restored lobby of The Paul Revere Williams designed La Concha.

PINBALL HALL OF FAME
This one is for the true geeks, but it's awesome. The Pinball Hall of Fame is not a solemn space dedicated to the Pinball wizards of the past... instead of a historical hall dedicated to the players, it's an exhibition of the greatest Pinball Machines of all time. The collection features hundreds of machines made between the 1950's- 90's as well as a few classic novelty arcade games. The museum places an emphasis on machines built between the 60's- 80's, an era known to Pinheads as the golden age of the game. Best of all, each and every machine is fully restored and playable. At rates of 25- 50 cents per game, it takes a lot longer to lose money there at any Casino in town.

Escape from Douchebaggery, Part 30: The Tell

The Tell is another one of those events that defies lazy stereotypes attached to Las Vegas. A glitzy haven of excess nicknamed Sin City with an economy fueled by vice industries, it's not a place generally considered the most literary of cities. In fact, the most famous book about Vegas uses the city to paint a vulgar picture (fueled by psychotropic drugs) of the American dream gone to rot.

I guess the organizers of The Tell never got the memo (I always like this cliche, btw... is there someone out there writing memos with facts like "Vegas isn't into books" or "the Niners will beat the Giants this Sunday?" Because if there is, I'd like to know how I could get that job since they seem to have the ability to get things wrong and stay employed) though, because they've created a truly cool storytelling event that's somehow found a big enough audience in Sin City of all places that its celebrating its third anniversary this month.

Local newspaper writers, comedians, musicians, writers, poets, actors, and more step up to the mic to tell their tales, which are usually at least loosely based around a set theme. Many of the participants are either locally or even nationally famous, while others are working folks from the area with a story to tell (the upcoming event features storytellers who are local teachers and State Police Officers/ poets, as well as actors with credits from big movies like Super Troopers and Cabin Fever).

Most of the stories take the form of This American Life style slice of life non-fiction at least loosely based around a theme, such as this week's upcoming I Fought the Law event (which will be given extra coherence as its held in the lobby of the new Las Vegas Mob Museum, a building that also once served as a courthouse where many big-time Mafioso made-men were tried back in the day). Many of the stories are hilarious, while some are heat-warming, and some are genuinely moving. No matter what, they're always honest.

The 3rd Anniversary Edition of The Tell takes place on Thursday, October 18th at 8:00 PM at The Las Vegas Mob Museum. Tickets are $10, totally worth it for a night of interesting stories told amongst curious and intelligent people. I'd be there if I was in Las Vegas this week, helping to prove that Las Vegas does indeed have a literary side.

Plugging a Blackhole: The North Strip

The north end of The Las Vegas Strip was not doing well before the recession, but the collapsing economy has been catastrophic for the area. Once the site of the last remaining old-school casinos, The Stardust was imploded to make room for a hotel that was never finished, The Sahara has been closed down to make room for a planned SLS Hotel, and all that remains are the increasingly low-rent Riviera and Circus Circus (which is billed as a family friendly destination complete with a theme park but is also the kind of place where you immediately remove the comforter on your hotel room bed).

So what is Las Vegas to do with this large chunk of the iconic Strip? While Steve Wynn's luxury towers were built towards the north end of The Strip as they square off against The Trump across the street, as if the two exceedingly rich men (who famously have no love for each other) chose their locations in order to have the world's most expensive staring contest, the flow of Bellagio-like luxury stopped there and isn't likely to continue. The SLS gamble may well pay off and create fancy-pants luxury resort even further up The Strip, but the dead zone creates an opportunity for casino builders to think smarter instead of bigger. Being the visionary that I am, here are my personal (and only half snarky) recommendations for how to fix the north Strip.

Go Old School: Conservative scumbag casino mogul Sheldon Adelson knocked down The Sands in 1996 to make way for The Venetian Resort. The Sands is still a powerful brand name (why else would he call his company Las Vegas Sands even after knocking down the resort?) and nostalgia for old-school Vegas style is still palpable, with a trilogy of Oceans 11 films grossing over $1 billion (with a b) worldwide over the last decade by riding a tone of neo-Rat Pack cool. The Mob Museum has opened its doors recently in celebration of the seedy history of Sin City. And even though Las Vegas has lost market share to the more loose book-keeping practices of Macau as a destination for the world's gamblers, it's still friggin' Las Vegas. Sin City is the original and someone needs to make the smart move by building a casino that plays off that history of Rat Pack cool and bad behavior. It be a bit ironic to knock down a property and build a modern take on The Sands barely a decade and a half after the original was destroyed... but Vegas is ever changing, so why can't it change back and regrow some of its roots?

Niche It Up: I've already noted in the past how nichey Las Vegas is becoming. The North Strip could be a great spot to serve some of the niches who are not coming to Las Vegas. Put that Ace Hotel I keep talking about in one of those empty lots, build a Standard Hotel (for the d-bag Entourage loving crowd who thinks they're artsy and interesting), create a techy and gamer-centric destination geeks will love, build a gay resort, target Latin-Americans (a strategy that's been working for nearby Primm), market to pirates. Builders can think smart as they build these more modest places with specific target audiences in mind instead of spending billions as they try to become all things to all people. And while these niche based properties will appeal to smaller audiences, those same audiences will be fiercely loyal to the resorts that speak to their desires directly.

Go Downscale: The pre-recession Vegas boom witnessed the opening of more and more luxury resorts on The Strip, but those salad days are over (I've never understood that term, btw... salads are sensible and healthy meals, so why does the term "salad days" mean a time of youthful irresponsibility? Just sayin'.) and more and more resorts have seen the writing on the wall. While Treasure Island (or TI as it's known to the kiddies) was never an upscale resort (even before Steve Wynn sold it), the place is now smartly marketing to mid level audiences, replacing upscale nightclubs with more affordable party destinations like Senor Frogs, Gilley's Salon, and Kahunaville. The entrepreneurs of the North Strip's future would be wise to follow this model as they build out in the desolate area. There's enough luxury options for the 1%... open some fun options for the rest of us out there.

Connect to Downtown: I know, I'm obsessed with the continued development of Downtown Las Vegas, but I find Tony Hseih's plan to renovate the area inspiring and fascinating. The North Strip and Downtown will never actually physically connect to each other, but they can do so spiritually. Downtown is becoming the part of Las Vegas where the cool, bohemian, artsy, and progressive can hang out... why can't the North Strip open a few bars and establishments that appeal to the creative class who live in and visit Sin City. And who knows, maybe Hseih, the Santa Clause of Downtown, will reach into his bottomless moneybag and build a monorail that connects the end of The Strip to his beloved hood? It might sound crazy, but making it easier (and cheaper) to travel between The Strip and Downtown will bring more people out to the area, which is exactly what Hseih wants and needs for his vision to succeed.

Turn Failures into Wins: Sure there are now a ton of empty lots where historic resorts once stood and luxurious new properties were supposed to tower above The Strip. But why not turn those failures into wins? Don't think of them as empty lots, think of them as giant theme parks. The owners of these failed properties could stop losing money every day with unfinished products and turn the husks of resorts they've built into fun attractions, like haunted houses, spots to install ziplines, or "recession tours."

Okay, this is a terrible idea, but someone has to do something with these massive empty lots.

The Future of Las Vegas

Before the 2008 economic apocalypse, Las Vegas was at its peak. Despite the fact that new mega-resorts opened seemingly once a month, the city's hotel rooms were at capacity nearly every weekend. The city itself was growing at a tremendous rate, as more and more people were flocking to the Nevada dessert for affordable homes, a decent school district, and proximity to one of the most famous tourist attractions on the planet. The scene for the young, hip, and artsy was looking up as well, with new galleries displaying the work of local artists and quirky bars popping up in Downtown.

Then everything caved in in the Fall of 2008. The entire country was (and still is) hurting, but the Las Vegas economy was damaged more severely than most. In a city where the economy is largely based around tourists spending disposable income, when the disposable income of most Americans ran dry, things got ugly. The city had one of the highest foreclosure rates in the country, and many of the normally occupied hotel rooms were empty on usually bustling weekends. Multi-billion dollar construction projects were abandoned, as sites of glorious future resorts became giant dirt pits.  Expensive luxury resorts often offer room deals that resemble the prices of The Hooters Hotel and Casino (I'm not hating on The Hooters Hotel and Casino, mind you...  I would never disparage a place where you can enjoy poolside Chicken Wings).

So things have been bleak in Las Vegas, and they've been bleak for almost half a decade. But Sin City, if it's anything, is a town that learns how to adapt to the times. And with that in mind, I will gaze into my i-Crystal Ball and read The Palms of the city (har har) as I deliver my (decidedly non-)expert predictions on the future of Las Vegas.


Vegas Will Become Increasingly Niche-Based
The internet has made fragmented culture beyond repair. There will never again be a show like Seinfeld that everyone in the country gathers around at the water cooler to discuss the morning after it airs (did anybody actually ever gather around water coolers to talk or was that just a term made up by marketers?); there will never be another album as ubiquitous as Thriller (and not just because there will never be a talent as unique as the young Michael Jackson); the concept of monocultue is dead, and there's nothing wrong with that. Individual tastes can be served and satisfied, creating micro-hits like Community, shows that draw minuscule audiences but create incredible loyalty in those small cults of people who tune in every week (with passionate bordering on vitriolic post-mortem internet discussions in which the finer points of every joke and reference are debated and mournful Twitter campaigns are launched in protest to the mere rumor of the show's cancellation).

The savviest Las Vegas marketers are aware of this fracturing of audiences, and more and more resorts are targeting specific audiences. While drawing sportsfans to bet on March Madness games has always been a go to strategy, many resorts are now going after more specific groups, with The Cosmo recently hosting an indie rock festival, while The Palms threw a big MTV Spring Break rager meant to attract Jersey Shore loving bros. While large-scale megahits like Jersey Boys and Cirque Du Soleil's many inceptions line The Strip, smaller shows with more specific audiences are opening all the time, like Mike Tyson's one man show at The MGM Grand and Confessions of a Rock Star at The Riviera (starring the former front man of 80's indie stalwarts The Smithereens).

Even as the finally economy recovers, I think this is going to be the new direction of Vegas. The monoculture will never put itself back together again, so the savviest resorts will do well targeting and creating loyalty amongst demographics with specific interests and passions.

So basically, my point is that someone should really consider building a Batman-themed Casino.

What's Old Is New Again
Mad Men. The Artist. Midnight in Paris. The past is so hot right now.

It's easy to spot the trend in the stores at Vegas malls and at the cocktail culture bars where mixologists dress in old-timey vests and spend extra time and care mixing Old Fashioneds and other cocktails that your grandfather was sipping when he first picked up your grandmother at a local gin joint (and then did unspeakable things to her in the bedroom. Grow up and deal with the fact that they're human beings who once had libidos just like you).

This trend, combined with the fact that the over the top themeing of casino design that dominated Vegas from the early 90s to the mid 00s has chilled out (no more fakey fake reconstructions of romantic cities in walking distance from each other), as places like Aria, The Palms, and The Cosmo are more about creating a cool and nice experience for adults instead of a Disneyish theme park filled with gambling and bad behavior. These combined trends lead me to the logical (in my mind) conclusion that the new trend in Vegas resort design will be retro cool. After years of knocking down the classic, Sinatra era resorts, I can envision the next crop of resorts being re-imagined versions of Strip classics like The Sands, The Stardust, The Dunes, and The Dessert Inn. While nostalgia can be the enemy of progress, the fun part of this trend will be that creative resort designers can pick and choose from the coolest aspects of the past, bringing back the classic Rat Pack vibe, complete with sexy lounges (and crooning lounger singers) and looking back to a time when having a cocktail in your hands at all times of the day meant you were a man, not an alcoholic.

Downtown Will Rise
Downtown Las Vegas is pretty rundown, but it has a savior in Zappos CEO Tony Hsieh, who has grand ambitions to breathe new life into the neighborhood. The Zappos heardquarters were moved into the former site of City Hall in the heart of the area, an honest to goodness indie coffee shop (complete with a vinyl records and a Zine library) opened nearby in an artist friendly building, the very ambitious Mob Museum just opened, and some of the most interesting bars in town are scattered along Fremont Street. But the area is still mostly a wasteland of vacant lots and crumbling old casinos.

If Hsieh is able to use his considerable influence and charm to attract other companies to move their offices to Downtown Las Vegas, a totally unique neighborhood, populated by young people with taste and money, will spring up and rejuvenate the area. The quirkier nature of the businesses that are already thriving in Downtown indicates that the area will have a different identity than The Strip, and the place could develop into the Las Vegas version of Williamsburg in Brooklyn or Silverlake (my home stomping grounds) in Los Angeles.

So look forward to many beards to grow along with interesting new hotels, bars, music venues, and galleries.

Jet Pack-Up Blackjack Tables
Swim-up blackjack tables are old news. In the future, the hippest resorts will have to build gaming tables that appeal to the inevitable Jet Pack trend that is surely finally on its way. 

Vegas is down right now, but like a glorious Butterfly dedicated to convincing people to gamble away money they can't afford to lose, it will emerge from its cocoon, evolved, adapted, and ready to spread its gloriously beautiful capitalistic wings.