Celebrating America in the Most American of Cities

Unfortunately, I won't be celebrating the 4th of July in Las Vegas this year. It's a shame because if any city knows how to Independence Day right, it's Vegas. Sin City is hardly a place that represents what's best about us as a nation, but it does represent what's massive, loud, stupid, and fun about us... and even though the American Revolution was one of the great victories for democracy and freedom, the 4th is really about Beer, BBQ, and Fireworks. Which is why I submit that Las Vegas is the ultimate destination for celebrating our nation's independence.

If the founding fathers hadn't taken a stand against England, we wouldn't be gambling in giant casinos with features like hugely wasteful water shows in the middle of the desert. We wouldn't be sipping sugary cheap margaritas out of comically large plastic souvenir cups (shaped like guitars that play riffs from Sammy Hagar hits or the Eiffel Tower) while we enjoyed colorful explosions above recreations of landmarks from all over the globe. And that's why Las Vegas is the best place to celebrate all the freedoms we enjoy today... but it comes with its own drawbacks. The town will be filled up more than usual, with a high percentage of bros who think the backward ballcap and no shirt look makes sense on any level. You'll need a guide to steer you to the best ways to enjoy Las Vegas on America Day. And even though I won't be there, let me be your Sindependence Day spirit guide.

Where to Stay: If I've said it once, I've said it a million times (or at least 15 times): when it doubt, head Downtown. The crowds will be fierce on The Strip and room rates will be high. Save some of that much needed booze money by checking into a Downtown Hotel. I've already sung the praises of the awesome Cabana Suites at the El Cortez. If you can't book a room in one of the boutiquey suites, you might be able to find a good deal at the old school Golden Nugget on Fremont Street... which has one of the best pool areas in Downtown (a necessary feature in the hot July sun) and the added bonus of featuring a translucent waterslide that goes through a shark tank. If you're filled with child-like glee and wonder (or just immature) like me, this feature alone is enough to get you to check in there.

Where to Keep Your Cool: Las Vegas is in the middle of the dessert, so visiting there in July means it will be very, very hot. Make sure you book a room at a hotel with a great pool area... and make sure said pool area doesn't become an obnoxious day-club/ pool party/ quasi-orgy during the summer. While resorts like The Hard Rock (who kicked off the trend with their Rehab parties) usually have a smaller and demure pool area, you'll want something more than the also ran pool. You'll want that perfect balance of a great place to take a dip with nice amenities without the loud bumping dubstep beats and that gross outdoor nightclub vibe. As mentioned above, The Golden Nugget probably has the best pool area in Downtown, but if you insist on ignoring my advice and staying on The Strip, Mandalay Bay has a massive playground for soaking in chlorinated water, complete with a wave pool, lazy river, multiple standard pools, and a few hot tubs. If you feel like gambling while you're swimming (because we live in a culture where multi-tasking is everything) The Off-Strip Red Rock Resort has a few chilled out swim up tables and Wynn will let you put down some money like a classy, James Bond style high roller (even though you're dripping wet and don't look as good as Daniel Craig or any of his many Bond girls in a swimsuit).

Where to Drink: I may be pretentious, but I'm not going to recommend that you totally avoid The Strip on America's birthday. I've sung the praises of Public House at The Venetian in a recent post, but let me reiterate this fact: if you love good beer, this is your best bet in Las Vegas. With hundreds of varieties of Craft Brew available and Nevada's first on-staff Cicerone (kind of like a Somelier for beer, also known as the best job in the world), this is the place you have to visit in order to properly raise a glass in honor of our flag. Also their burgers are awesome.

Where to Eat like an American Hero: Nothing says America like scarfing down on some fatty meats, and if you're not going to miss out on grilled food prepared in a backyard because you're in Vegas, there are still plenty of places to enjoy BBQ style cuisine. As mentioned above, Public House has an excellent burger, while Holstein's at The Cosmopolitan, KGB Burger at Harrah's, and Hubert Keller's Burger Bar at Mandalay Bay all offer gourmet twists on the American classic. Hot Dog lovers have some great options, like LA icon Pink's at Planet Hollywood and Brooklyn classic Nathan's at New York New York. And if you're looking for some kitsch mixed with your ribs, enjoy a down home meal at Lynyrd Skynyrd's BBQ and Beer at Excalibur, which serves surprisingly excellent Southern comfort style food (just don't tell Neil Young you ate there).


Where to Watch Explosions: Caesars always fires off an epic round of fireworks every 4th of July. Sometimes the most mainstream and obvious answer is also the correct one. Try and score spots close to the action, because the sidewalk will fill up fast. If you don't want to stand around for hours holding a spot for yourself while you're on vacation (and you don't mind splurging a little bit), book a table at one of The Bellagio's fancy pants restaurants with patio seating on The Strip... I've eaten at Todd English's Olives, and it's a bit pricey but also excellent. You can enjoy the fireworks show from a comfortable seated view, an excellent meal, and perfect views of the resort's famous dancing fountain show. Note: this plan is best implemented if you're in Vegas with that special someone. But there's nothing wrong with sharing a bottle of wine and a fine meal by a beautiful body of water with a few your closest bros.

So get out to Vegas and get blitzed, gorge yourself on unhealthy food, waste time by the pool, and enjoy sparkling explosions in the sky in America's stupidest city... and celebrate the fact that you live in a country where you have the freedom to be as stupid as you wanna be.

Escape from Douchery, Part 13: Public House at The Venetian

With the arrival of Public House at The Venetian, craft beer culture has truly arrived in Las Vegas... and at one of the most popular resorts in the middle of The Strip, no less.

Gastropubs serving upscale bar food and rotating craft beer selections have become all the rage in LA. What started as a trend for Eastsiders looking for something more flavorful than Budweiser to pair with their burgers has become a hot trend all over the city. Now even a square patch of the greater LA area like Studio City boasts Boneyard Bistro, a funky yet upscale joint that serves Kobe Beef Chili-filled Donuts, taps kegs of Russian River Brewery's legendary Pliny the Younger (a beer-geek obsession released just once a year that's so perfect it's worth murdering everyone you've ever loved to score a pint), and plays obscure indie bands like Woods in the background.

And now Vegas is getting in on the act, in the most mainstream of venues. While microbreweries are not a new trend in Vegas, Public House at The Venetian is one of the first high profile Gastropubs on The Strip. And it stacks up nicely against the many similar joints in Los Angeles.

Public House Venetian has an upscale yet loose and relaxed vibe, with low tables in the bar area and plush leather booths in the main dining room. Rich brown woods line the walls and flooring, while funky art hangs all over the space. The Pub-House can get pretty loud at night, with crowds of excited patrons drowning out the chilled-out background music. The food is awesome; I shared a few small plates, including Roasted Bone Marrow (a delicious taste adventure if you're willing to take the journey) and tried their Pub Burger, which compared favorably to the legendary offerings from LA's Father's Office and The Lazy Ox Canteen.

But the beer is the main attraction of a good Gastropbub, and Public House at The Venetian has no shortage of great suds on tap at a place with the motto "united we stand, pint in hand" (which is incredibly stupid but I secretly love rhymes, so I'll allow it). The restaurant offers hundreds of Beers, served out of taps, bottles, and casks, sourced from some of the best breweries in the country. I'm a big fan of Dogfish Head Beers (as is anyone who is "into beer" in a real way), so I started with their famous 90-Minute IPA. But then I found out that Public House had puled out the big guns by employing the first Cicerone (a fancy-pants job that is basically the Beer-version of a Sommelier) in the state of Nevada. I flagged the guy down to pick his brain/ prove what I knew (because I'm horribly insecure and was seeking validation of any kind). He clearly knew his stuff and I ended up getting talked into a delicious Ballast Point Sculpin IPA, which has also become somewhat legendary in Beer Advocate reading circles.  Like any great Gastropub, the owners of Public House are always swapping out what they have on Tap and in their Casks.

Public House at The Venetian is just a part of a trend that's spreading quickly through Las Vegas. Todd English P.U.B. at Aria has already tapped into the craze, while The Luxor is opening their own restaurant called Public House that's totally unrelated to the gem in The Venetian. The Cosmopolitan has Holstein's, while The Pub at Monte Carlo has a pretty decent selection of beers on tap. But The Venetian's Public House is your best bet if you want to experience an LA-style gastropub, with a menu of delicious upscale bar food, a funky-cool atmosphere, and a brew selection that will make even the most pretentious beer geeks swoon.

Escape From Douchery, Part 8: Ellis Island Casino and Brewery

Craft brews have become another major trend for the young, hip and with it, and I'm going to use that fact as yet another litmus test to figure out how Las Vegas is developing into a truly hipster friendly city (you are doubtlessly noticing a trend in these blog posts at this point).

Vegas is a city that is fueled by alcohol. When beer and liquor are flowing, the philosophy goes, people are loosened up and keep gambling. While Sin City has not quite caught up with every hipster trend (I haven't seen many artisanal, organic, fair trade cheese stores in Vegas... yet), the increasing popularity of good and interesting beers is right in the Vegas wheelhouse. Craft breweries that offer adventurous pours are out there, if you know where to look.

While cocktail waitresses slinging comped drinks on casino floors are unlikely to pour you anything more exciting than a Fat Tire (no knock on Fat Tire, they're still one of my favorite nationally distributed beers), there are definitely a few places where you can find tasty brews made and distributed in the city. Sin City Brewing Company makes beers with "cleverly themed" (read "appropriately douchey") names like "Weisse is Nice," "Never Pass Up a Blonde," "Say Hello to Amber," and "The Dark Side of Sin," with locations in The Miracle Mile Shops at Planet Hollywood, The Grand Canal Shoppes at The Venetian and a location at The Flamingo with a large outdoor patio for sipping on your suds. In  Downtown Vegas, check out The Chicago Brewing Company in The Four Queens for a good selection of craft brews along with brewery favorite foods like pizza and burgers, or The Triple 7 Restaurant and Microbrewery at Main Street Station, which has become such a draw that the resort now markets itself as a "Casino, Brewery, and Hotel."


But if you really want an authentic Vegas experience to go with your microbrews, Ellis Island Casino and Brewery is a favorite of local beer enthusiasts, with a great selection of microbrews, sold at a shockingly reasonable price of less than $2 a glass. While gambling at the smokey and old-school off-Strip casino, cocktail waitresses will comp you with free beers if you ask nicely. Their restaurant is extremely cheap (like $5 for Steak and Eggs in the morning cheap), and the food is surprisingly better than merely edible.

The Casino and Brewery is located slightly off the beaten path, about a block east of The Strip. It's not nearly as slick as a place like Aria or The Cosmopolitan, but that's probably why locals dig it so much. It's unpretentious, the betting minimums at the gaming tables are low, and it has a scuzzy sleaziness that feels authentic and lived in, an increasingly rare atmosphere in Las Vegas these days.


Ellis Island's beers include a nice Amber, a summery Hefeweissen, a pleasingly hefty Dark Lager, and a Light lager (which I didn't even bother with; if you're drinking beer, just admit that it's not gonna be good for you no matter what and skip the light crap). They also brew a delicious Root Beer, which took me back to childhood memories of sharing a root-beer float my first girlfriend in the local Soda Shop (memories that might be from an old movie, and not my own childhood, now that I think of it).

To be clear, Ellis Island's Beers didn't approach the mind-blowing flavor of a cold Pliny the Elder from The Cap 'N' Cork in Los Feliz, but they got the job done... and get it done for absurdly cheap. Ellis Island is certainly worth a detour from The Strip for cheap eats and even cheaper craft brews.